1) Many of the solutions to our most pressing problems already exist in our head. So why do we struggle to solve our own problems? Fears and assumptions blind us. We’re afraid of change, and tend to limit our options to the two or three obvious answers—and fail to consider outside-of-the-box solutions. Furthermore, we often place high expectations on our decision—assuming the result will be all or nothing. Once you weed out the noise and get to the root of the issue, the answer becomes far clearer.
2) We assume that everyone will view and solve our dilemma the same. We ask friends and family for advice, and sometimes professionals, and then we repeat—the same frustrations and concerns over and over, hoping to satisfy our need for understanding. We don’t just want our predicament to be heard, we want it completely validated. Why? Revisit #1 for the answer.
3) We absolutely ignore the most important consideration of all: learning to recognize what we can and can’t control. We fear what we can’t control, and try to control what we fear. We waste a lot of energy on the wrong problems.
4) We are too close to ground zero to see beyond the smoke. When faced with overwhelming adversity we ARE ground zero. Success can be attained when someone—with a neutral understanding of our issues—leads us through the fog and into clear air.
A professional trained educator or coach helps individuals recognize the true issues at hand, as well as the emotions, such as fear, anger or sadness that hold us hostage and keep us rooted in discord.[/span10]